MotorTrend pushes the envelope with their latest review. In an unique and surprising article, the US magazine places the BMW X6 M against some unusual competitors: Cadillac CTS-V Wagon and Porsche Panamera. And if that wasn’t odd enough, taking them at the drag strip to see who comes out on top is just simply the icing on the cake.
Before we have a look at the video, let’s see some highlights from their review:
You know the old line about the inmates running the asylum? Well, the asylum’s been handing out engineering degrees, and the inmates are now running BMW, Cadillac, and Porsche. Meet the Unicorns — three cars, in the words of Raoul Duke, too weird to live and too rare to die. Each is a manifestation of a novel concept: maximum performance mated to oodles of capacity and practicality.
All three vehicles are also patently absurd, in the very best possible sense of the word-so bizarre that we had to road-trip them to the only American city capable of standing up to this trio’s epic level of whoa: Las Vegas.
If the four-door Porker is the fall of Rome, the BMW X6 M is Incitatus, the horse Caligula appointed senator. This beast makes no sense. Consider that the X6 M weighs nearly 5200 pounds, yet comes with a 555-horsepower twin-turbo V-8. That’s 55 horses more than the Porsche. All that grunt combined with such a chiseled and aggressive exterior makes the most controversial M badge ever a true highway menace. It’s a real middle finger of a monster blowing up your rearview mirror. And we like that.
But you have to wonder, did BMW go far enough? The X6 M weighs 2.5 tons and seats only four while returning very poor fuel economy (14.6 mpg on our watch). If that’s not anti-social, I don’t know what is. But why stop there? If you’re going to be the bane of the environmental movement, if everyone who sees you driving your own personal attack truck is instantly, automatically going to hate your guts, best to keep your right foot down, right? Why not make the X6 M a single seater? Better yet, why not a single seater with center steering? And instead of doors, how about a roof hatch? There’s way too much useable storage space (25.6 cubic feet, almost 10 cubic feet more than in the spacious Panamera). BMW ought to — I think — fill the rear of this gnarly puppy with lead. Seriously, why not?